Thursday, June 16, 2011


When I'm tired (like right now) and achy (like right now), the effort to think coherent thoughts seems about as futile as trying to make sense out of white noise.  Or trying to hear a whisper in an engine room.  Or trying to understand a completely foreign language.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Dream of a Miracle Cure

I had a weird dream this morning.  What's new, right?  Actually, this was one of the kind that feel so real... in fact, was notable for being markedly less weird than my usual dreams.

There was this man - dark hair, charismatic, looked like a handsome actor who usually plays the successful, driven businessman who turns out to be the bad guy.  He wasn't a bad guy here, but did have a forceful personality.

So this guy, this dark haired, charismatic guy... he came up with an amazing, almost "miracle cure" kind of thing.  The primary ingredient was whipped egg whites.  Or maybe it was a derivative of whipped egg whites.  Anyway, this stuff could completely erase scars and wrinkles, but it also cured things like... I don't know, cancer, pancreatitis and kidney disease.  Older people were especially benefiting from complete and total health.  So I guess it addressed arthritis, osteoporosis and heart disease.

The cures were pretty much instantaneous and lasting.  The man made a big deal of it, like at a religious revival, where he would call people up to the stage one at a time, ask them what their problems were, and apply this miracle egg-white stuff in different ways, depending on what was wrong.  Everyone - everyone - was cured, instantly and completely.  Then he would have fun with them, fixing little things like those crow's feet they disliked.

The drawback was that this stuff interacted badly with a few kinds of medications.  People who wanted to be cured by it had to be off these medications.  Nothing unusual there, pharmaceutically speaking (is that even a word?).  Except in the case of the allergy medicine Zyrtec.  If a person had ever taken Zyrtec, even once, they were no longer a candidate for this egg-white treatment.

Having had seasonal allergies since childhood, there was a short time I did take Zyrtec in real life.  (It worked okay for about a month or so, then lost effectiveness.)

In my dream, I was talking with a couple of old ladies about what they wanted to have cured and trying to decide whether to lie about the Zyrtec in my own past.

In the dream, people did often lie in order to receive treatment.  This infuriated the dark-haired man because, while sometimes the treatment worked anyway, there was a measurable chance of negative interactions and even death.  He was angry not only because it made him and his product look bad, but more to the point, he felt powerless to help the people who had lied.

I woke up, and, as dreams sometimes do, it had felt so real.  It seemed important.  Maybe sometime soon, a biologist or chemical engineer somewhere will read this and think to himself, "Egg whites... cetirizine hydrochloride... EUREKA!"  Who knows?

In the meantime, if you're suffering from seasonal allergies, there's Alfalfa Complex from Shaklee, made primarily from - you guessed it - alfalfa, with a litte bit of spearmint.  Rich in protein, calcium, minerals, and vitamins A, B, C, D, E and K, alfalfa can be helpful in various illnesses and ailments including:

  • Anemia
  • Diabetes
  • Indigestion and bladder disorders
  • Menopause
  • Poor lactation
  • High blood pressure
  • Intestinal ulcers
  • Gastritis
  • Asthma
  • Eczema
  • Constipation
  • Body and breath odor
  • Infections
  • Burns
  • Athletes foot
  • Cancer
  • Urinary tract problems
  • Atherosclerosis
  • Nosebleeds
  • Osteoporosis
Check it out.